Incorporating our Heritage

Mr. CC and I really wanted a way to incorporate our heritage into our wedding.  Mr. CC is mostly Irish, and is able to trace back his ancestry back into the early 1600s.  My family is a little more diverse, lots of German and the rest is Irish and English.

The weekend we got engaged, Mr. CC kept talking about wanting a claddagh ring.

(source)

A few weeks after our engagement, Mr. CC went back to Savannah and got himself (from me, of course!) a claddagh.  He wears it wrong (on his left hand with the heart pointed towards his fingernail), but that’s ok.  We are looking for a nicer claddagh for his wedding band.

And when I saw this druid astrology on Martha Stewart’s site, I knew we had to put it in our programs.

Other Irish traditions include wearing a blue dress (nope, not happening) and getting married on St. Patrick’s day.  It is also traditional for the bride and groom to walk to the chapel together.  Onlookers would not only throw rice to bless the marriage, but often pots and pans as well (ouch!).  Honeymoon’s also have their roots in Ireland.  The newlyweds would spend a month in seclusion, drinking honeyed wine, in case their parents disapprove.  Tradition says the bride would be pregnant after a month in seclusion and then her family would desire for her to stay with her husband.

Then I started researching German and English traditions, mostly just for kicks, although I did find some interesting ideas.

The tradition of having a best man is German.  Apparently, the groom sometimes needed help stealing his bride from her village and would enlist his “best man” to help.  Germans also plant trees when a baby girl is born and when she gets engaged, they cut them down and sell them for her dowry.  A unique custom is the wedding newspaper which is created by the couple’s friends and families and sold at the reception to fund the honeymoon.  I might do this, I suppose it depends on how many of my other projects are left, and no, we will not sell it.

The English consider rain on the wedding day good luck.  A reception tradition is the ribbon pull, where the bridesmaids pull charms out of the cake for luck and fortune.  I understand this is a common tradition in the south, and we may be incorporating it.  The traditional English wedding cake is a fruit cake (also not happening) and the groom’s cake has it’s roots in the Tudor period.  The flower girl is also an English tradition.

How are you incorporating your heritage into your wedding?

all traditions found on WorldWeddingTraditions

Weight Loss Woes

I was on the colorguard (or flag corp, whichever) in high school, and I was in the best shape of my life.  I could easy do 100 pushups and situps.  My legs were in great shape from dancing on the football field 5-6 days a week and my arms were cut from throwing equipment around while dancing on the field.  And I was bloody skinny.  Not so much anymore.  I started gaining weight before Mini CC was born, and while I did lose most of my pregnancy weight, there’s still some hanging around.

Now that Christmas is over, and I no longer have the holidays as an excuse to not bother losing weight, it’s time to get serious.

The weight that needs to go isn’t alot (about 15-20 lbs.), but it’s there, and I can feel it making a negative impact on my health.  My back hurts, my hips hurt, and I’m tired all the time.  I don’t have a lot of energy. It’s definitely time to make a change.

What I don’t want to do is crash diet.  I’ll gain the weight right back and those crash diets are usually not very good for you.  I want to make a positive change in my life style.

I already eat pretty good.  I can’t eat a lot of carbs, because they reek havoc on my stomach.  Plus, Mr. CC is a diabetic, so we shouldn’t eat them anyway. Diets don’t really work for me anyway.  I have no will power and as soon as I tell myself I can’t have something (chocolate or sodas, or whatever) that’s all I’ll want.  I need caffeine, so I can’t give up on soda/coffee completely, but I do drink diet soda and use fat free creamer and splenda in my coffee.  I do, however, need to drink more water.  I like to put those crystal light packets in my water.  I can slug down bottle after bottle of that stuff!

What I need is a good exercise plan.  It’s not easy getting motivated to work-out.  I get very, very bored with walking/running.  I need constant motivation.  Or at least constant entertainment.

Momma CC bought me Wii Fit for my birthday.  The first time I got on it, I was devastated.  My Crab Cake Mii got all pudgey around the middle and the darn thing told me my Wii Fit age was like 42.  I messed around with it for a few minutes, but didn’t really have any desire to get back on it.  That was two months ago.

A few days ago, I sucked it up and climbed on again.  Yes, Crab Cake Mii got all pudgey again and my BMI is still way too high.  But this time my Wii Fit age was 20.  That’s a huge difference!  I’m not sure what I did differently this time, but it obviously worked!.  So I spend about 45 minutes hoola hooping my way to very sore abs.  It felt good and it was fun.  I probably could have kept at it for quite some time, but it was about time to get to bed (I had to work night shift last week and needed a nap that afternoon to prepare).  I haven’t had a chance to get back on, with two night shifts, Christmas, and then a road trip to retrieve Mini from her Dad, but I’m anxious to get back on and play some more!

I’m also going to attempt the hundred pushups training program.  I can do about 12 right now.

What tools are you using to lose weight?  Is dieting working for you?  What do you do to motivate yourself?

(not a) fashionista

As if putting together the wedding day ensemble wasn’t difficult enough, we brides have to have two (sometimes three or four) well designed, classy outfits.

I am kinda lazy when it comes to fashion.  I wear jeans and tennis shoes most days.  T-shirts and cardigans.  I’m just not that motivated to get up on my days up and get dressed up.  Hey, at least I wear makeup and fix my hair on a regular basis!

So, aside from coordinating my wedding day ensemble, I am trying to put together a super cute rehearsal outfit.

I had originally decided to make my rehearsal dress.  I simply had my heart set on the perfect design and didn’t want to stray.  I even bought the fabric.  But here we are, 6 months out and I haven’t made my muslin mock-up.  And I have way too many other project to work on to toil with making my own dress.  So, I re-purposed that gorgeous dupioni silk (more on that later) and went back to the drawing room.

But then I was back at square one.  I don’t really care that much about looking “bridal.”  I do want to be able to wear the dress again, and I know I won’t if it’s white/ivory.  I’m not particularly interested in matching the color scheme. I have an image of what I would dress Mr. Crab Cake in if it were up to me (and I might pick out his clothes for him, but again, more on that later).  And since we were going with the vintage theme, I thought it would be fun to wear a vintage dress.

This isn’t the first time I’ve shopped for vintage dresses, so I had a good idea of where to look first.  I went straight to TrashyDiva.  They have some really amazing vintage looks.  Their prices leave a bit to be desired, but I can splurge this one time.

Some of my favorites:

(Alexa in Heavy Weight Silk Crepe de Chine)

(Carrie in Silk Georgette)

This one makes me think of Mrs. Avocado, I believe she would look fantastic in it and I think it matches LDS modesty standards.

(Dottie in Toile, Cotton Voile)

I really love this dress, but I think my Aunt is going to be wearing it to the wedding, so I should probably pick something else.

I think I’ve narrow it down to these two dresses.

(Ava in Black and White Dots, Cotton Voile)

I really love this style, but it’s white.

(Avian in Navy Embroidered Eyelet Cotton Voile)

I am really in love with this dress, just not it’s price.

And while I’m not adverse to buying new shoes, I have these really cute vintage style flats that I’d love to wear.

(Selena Flats from Target)

So what do you girls think?  Which dress should I wear?  Should I wear the yellow flats, or look for something else?

Baby, we got it

I spent the evening sorting through old family photos in preparation for a wedding project I have conveniently delegated to another family member and ran across some photos from my last relationship.

Mr. CC and I don’t really discuss my relationship with Mini’s dad.  But I think he can sense the tension and change in my attitude when he does something that reminds me of that miserable experience.  So tonight, I got to thinking about what made that relationship fail, and what makes our relationship work.

Mr. CC and I are a team.  We try to share housework.  Even though I still handle most of the domestic chores, like laundry and cooking and mopping, Mr. CC manages our finances and takes care of the yard.  We work together on raising Mini. We make all the household decisions together, even if it means I narrow fabric choices down to three or four and he makes the final decision.

It’s taken us a long time to get to this point.  We struggled to learn to work together and not against each other.  And when I see we, I really mean me.  My household was run a lot differently with my ex.  He worked, and I stayed home and cooked, cleaned, and raised his son, and then our daughter.  I was very used to managing the entire house by my self.  I didn’t ask for help well.  After I left my ex and graduated from Nursing school, Mini and I moved into our own little tiny apartment.  I did everything.  I was very in charge and kinda got used to “my way.”  I developed some OCD tendencies, like how the forks have to be put away just so, and the towels folded just so.  I am fully aware that these requests demands are highly unreasonable, but if it’s not done that way, I have to go back and re-organize.  I’m a virgo, and that perfectionist nature has a pretty firm grip on me.

On the other hand, Mr. CC was a bachelor for 12 years before moving in with me.  12 years of man habits is a lot to undo.  He never put his clothes away.  Towels were scarce, and so not usually folded, but slung back over the curtain rod in the bathroom.  Dishes were disposable.  Dinners consisted of microwaved corn beef hash or cheese infused hot dogs.  Vacuuming was a bi-annual chore and toilets never got cleaned, he just moved to a new apartment.

As an OCD nurse and a bit of a germaphobe, this was completely un-acceptable to me.  We’re still working on the frequency of how often things need to be done, and there’s still some man habits that need to be broken.  I’m working on letting somethings go, and trying to assist him in being neater and not nagging him about it.

Mr. CC and I both have a very strong work ethic.  He just started a new job after 7+ years at his last job.  And while I’m on my third job since graduation, I am extremely loyal to my company and don’t intend to leave, at least not anytime soon.  There isn’t a whole lot of concern about finances, although we are still trying to get some debt under control (which is hard to do when every spare penny lands in the wedding fund).  My ex was under the impression that the grass was always greener on the other side and changed jobs about 4 times a year.  This made making ends meet very difficult.  I’ve spent most of my adult life worried about how the bills were going to get paid, and it’s nice to finally have some relief from that.  Don’t get me wrong, we aren’t rich and we don’t live by a strict budget, but our bills get paid and we have some savings.  We also own our home.  We’re still not recession proof, but we are optimistic.

We support each other, almost to a fault.  We don’t necessarily agree on everything, but we make a point to hash out our differences in private rather than embarrass one another by argueing in public.  It doesn’t always work, but we’re not perfect either.  Yes, we raise our voices and sometimes our fights get down right out of control.  We are both as stubborn as the day is long and it shows.  We just try to keep it to ourselves.

I think the most important thing that keeps us together is that we maintain our own lives.  While I am usually perfectly willing to accompany him to a re-enactment, I don’t have to go if I don’t want to.  He doesn’t get my knitting/sewing obsession, but he supports it anyway.  He does stuff with the boys, and I do stuff with the girls.  Then we do stuff together.  He has his friends, I have mine.  Some of them overlap.  I do have a jealous streak that comes out sometimes, especially when I find out he had lunch with a bunch of his girl friends, but I try not to let on.  He’s a sociallite, and I’m a home body.  He has to drag me out of the house sometimes, and our independence of each other makes that okay.  I can stay at the house while he goes out and no one is mad.

We’re not perfect and there’s still kinks that need to be worked out.  We’re still perfecting the chore routine (but I think it’s going to be a life-long project).  We both realize that building a life together is work.  Love is a verb and marriage probably should be one too.

What qualities do you and your FH have that make “it” work?

Vendor Preview: Kristian Odgen Photography

I loved Miss HC’s vendor preview post so much the other day that I thought it would be a great way to showcase some of my vendors, beginning with my Photographer.

A little background on the photography saga.  Mr. CC has a friend who dabbles in photography.  He asked her to shoot our engagement photos and I was, in the beginning, interested in having her do the wedding as well.  Since then, we have had communication issues and I made the executive decision that we needed to hire someone who was a professional, not a dabbler.

I searched the internet and exhausted all the resources and wasn’t happy at all.  All the photographers who gave me good vibes (through their website/blog) were way out of our price range.  The photographers in our price range kinda gave me the heebie-geebies.  Like, their images were cheesy and contrived.  I was not pleased.

One night I was reading the blog of a local photographer who does mostly family sessions.  She was booked and was recommending another photographer.  So, I clicked over to her blog and got in touch.  I was nervous about meeting her, because there were no prices on her website and we all know how that normally goes.

It turns out she was totally down to earth and really friendly, and her prices were perfect!  She offered all the things that were really important to me.  I was done!

So, I present to you, our photographer, Kristian Ogden.

I am a portrait and wedding photographer based out of Columbus, GA. Ever since I was in grade school, I have always loved art, especially photography, drawing and painting. After giving birth to my first son, Brayden, I really put all my artistic focus on photography.

As a good parent you have to have pictures made of your children, but I knew I didn’t want the same posed portraits against the same studio backdrop that everyone has haging in their home. I wanted something different…something unique that told the world who my little boy really was, so I began, on my own, to capture the natural beauty and innocence I saw in Brayden and in the memories we had begun to create as a family.

I quickly realized how much I loved portrait photography, and I also realized that there was a growing general demand for portraits that showed the true spirit, emotion and connection of their subjects, so I officially started Kristian Ogden Photography. Shortly after becoming a portrait photographer, I decided to expand my business to include weddings, and I haven’t looked back or slowed down since.

I absolutely love having the opportunity to capture the memories of one of the most important times in a couple’s life, and I enjoy creating pieces of art that they will treasure for a lifetime. Being a bride once myself, I know how much effort goes into pulling off a wedding, so I always try to make a couple’s special day go as smoothly and as stress free as possible, and I use my photojournalistic style of photography to tell the whole story… from the smallest detail to the most intimate kiss.

They way I look at it, your wedding album should tell more about your wedding day than what color the dresses were and how big the cake was.

Kristian Ogden Photography

website blog

My ring

The first time I was engaged, I picked out and purchased my own ring.

This time, I didn’t want to have anything to do with the purchasing of the ring.  I just wanted to be completely surprised.

So, when Mr. CC and I started talking about getting married, I had only two requests.  The first was that I didn’t want to have anything to do with picking out the ring.  And the second was that I be completely surprised by the proposal.

Of course, he wanted some help with what I wanted in a ring.  All I told him was that I wanted something vintage.  And I didn’t think about it again.  I didn’t look at a single engagement ring until I saw mine.

And he did a fantastic job with my ring.  It’s an antique setting, found at an estate sale, likely from the 20s or 30s.  He picked out the diamonds after the setting had been found.

He thinks it’s too small.  He thinks I don’t like it.  He said to me one day, “I should have waited longer to propose so you could have a bigger ring.”

I basically tell him to shut up anytime this subject comes up.

Because I love my ring.  I think it’s perfect.

Those was taken inside of the roses he brought me at work on our Negative 1 year anniversary.

And these were taken after that fantastic post by Anne Ruthmann.

(That’s my Lenox elephant salt shaker, I’ve had those for ever!)

This is my favorite!  It’s taken on the tension dial on my antique Singer.

Our Direction

Mr. Crab Cake can testify that I’m very indecisive.  I can pick something out, love it for a few weeks, and the minute I see something better, I’m in new love with it and completely out of love with the other.

When we first started this journey, I had no theme.  Just colors.  But I was having a really hard time pulling everything together.  It really just wasn’t working for me.  I had, at one point, fallen in love with a modern pink and orange floral kind of thing.  But then I decided that our venue didn’t really allow for that kind of theme.  Then I fell in love with peonies.  Head over heels for peonies.  I googled peonies for hours, peony stamps, peony projects, peony fabric, silk peonies, you name it, I looked for it.  I told my florist I had to have peonies.  I bought $160 worth of silk peonies for our centerpieces.  I bought peony stamps and had designed all of our stationary around peonies.  Mr. Crab Cake was trying to deal with the multitude of pink, but I could tell that everytime we had a conversation that involved a color decision, he would say, “just not pink.”  Mr. Crab Cake is not a pink kinda guy.

So one night, I was reading through my favorite blogs, and I came across this post on StyleMePretty.

I thought it was a really cute idea, and innocently showed it to Mr. CC, not knowing that it would change the course of our wedding yet again.

This time, Mr. CC fell head over heels.  He begged and pleaded, but I could put the map paper with the peonies.  It wasn’t working in my head.  But he said, “Please, this whole thing is about you, can I please have this one thing?”

And then I had a revelation.  He was right.  The whole thing was all about me.  It was pink, very, very pink.  And flower-y, and girl-y.  And didn’t reflect his personality, or our personality at all.  So, I agreed to the map cupcake tower, with one stipulation.  I wanted a vintage map.  He was more than happy to oblige.

I decided that I would play down the peonies, and work on the map/compass theme. I struggled some more, and googled lots of things, mostly looking for something to bring everything together.

Then I came across a short poem from Ian Burgham.

And you,

A windrose, a compass

My direction, my description of the world.

And I was golden.  Things really took off from there and I was back on google looking for the perfect vintage compass clipart.  Turns out I didn’t need to go any further than my own hard drive, because I pulled the graphic out of my word processors clip art files and edited it in paint.net (my freebie substitute for illustrator).

And thus was born our vintage map/compass themed wedding.

Freebie Favors!

My mother, Miss Crab Cake and I were walking back to the car in Santa Barbara when I saw a shoe store that was having a going out of business sale.  I suggested we go in which Mom and Ms. C had no problems with.  After about 10 minutes, both Miss C and I had each found a $100 pair of shoes for less then $30 bucks.  Mom mom was trying on some shoes when the salesman who sold us the shoes came over and gave me a few black boxes.  He said, “Here, have a few of these.  We are going out of business and I have thousands of ‘um.”  I was curious so I opened the box to see what our parting gift was.  It turned out to be a nice key chain compass with a whistle.  Miss C saw it and jumped at the opportunity to get some more.

She looked at the sales guy and said, “Well, since you’re trying to get rid of them, can I have 200?”

He looked at her strangely as if to say, “Did I just hear you right?”

She continued.  “No, really, we are getting married in six months and it’s going to be a compass themed wedding and we can use those as gifts!”

The guy nodded, disappeared behind the counter for a minute, and returned with 100 compass key chains.

She smiled and said, “No, really, I need 200.”

So he took a deep breath and turned back around to get another 100 compass key chains.  He came back and placed two more boxes on the seat.  He looked at them and said, “Looks like you’ll need another bag.”  So as he turned to go get it, Miss C followed him and said, “Can I get another 50.  You know, just in case we have more people come then we planned for.”

At this point, he was totally on board with us.  I mean, he had to get rid of the key chains, and we were taking 250 of them off his hand.  Mom bought her shoes, and we left with about $300 worth of shoes and 250 compass key chains in three bags all for under $100.  What a deal, huh?  Talk about right place right time!

- Mr. CC

A break

Mr. Crab Cake and I just go home from a 9 day trip to California!  We had a great time and it was so nice to (sorta) get a break from the wedding.  Mr. Crab Cake forbid me from talking about the wedding with him while we were gone, but that didn’t stop all of his family from asking about the wedding.

For me, this was a major introduction to Mr. Crab Cake’s California family.  His mom, Aunt Weeshee, Grandma, and Uncle Ray live out there.  I’d met FMIL Crab Cake and Aunt Weeshee before the trip, but this was my first visit with Grandma and Uncle Ray.  I wasn’t so worried about Uncle Ray, as he and his wife are pretty laid back.  But Grandma was a different story.

You see, FMIL Crab Cake is also a RN.  She’s been nursing since 1972!  She actually started her career on the same unit I work in now!  Anyway, because of her strange hours, Mr. Crab Cake spent a lot of time with Grandma.  She was had a major influence in his life, and he is always singing her praises!  I was really nervous this woman would not like me.  Turns out she was singing my praises after we left, and all is well!

While we were out there, we had the opportunity to visit some great places and make some amazing memories!  We went to the Pier at Santa Monica, Disneyland, Hollywood, a Tonight Show taping, and celebrated Grandma’s 80th birthday twice!!

Here we are on top of the Ferris Wheel on Santa Monica Pier.  Mr. Crab Cake is taking a business call on his cell.  That thing went off all week!

Lunch at Bubba Gump’s.  Not bad for Californian Southern Seafood.  That pea soup fog just does wonders for my hair, doesn’t it?

The sea gulls in Cali are huge!  What do you guys feed those things?

The Mission at Santa Barbara, more pea soup fog.

I’m just starting to feel the effects of jet-lag!  No more pictures!!!

Mr. Crab Cake and I in front of Gruman’s Chinese Theater.  I wonder who Mr. Crab Cake is checking out?

Here I am in line to get into Disney.  Mr. Crab Cake had already taken about 6 pictures of me by this point, and I was beginning to get fed up with it.

That’s FMIL Crab Cake!

FMIL Crab Cake, Aunt Weeshee, and me in the Tiki Room.  Yeah, I totally rocked the Minnie Mouse Bride ears for about half the day.  Then they started to pinch my head and I stowed them in our rental locker.  Mini Crab Cake has been wearing them since we got back.

Aunt Weeshe and I about to get on Space Mountain!  She’s the best!

Grandma’s 80th birthday celebration on her actual birthday.  We ate dinner at the Pierpont Inn and it was fantastic!

Yeah, still at the Pierpont.

Mr. Crab Cake and the infamous Grandma!

All the family that showed up at Grandma’s surprise party the next night.  This was our entire motivation for going to California!

The best view of the beach we got all week, taken from the car on PCH.

Needless to say, we had a great time!  It was so great to meet all of Mr. Crab Cake’s family.  And, we even picked up something for the wedding while we were out there.  But I’m going to let Mr. Crab Cake tell y’all that story later!

Our non-existent budget

I think I might have mentioned once or twice that we’re definitely doing this wedding budget style.  While we don’t officially have a “budget,” we are trying to put on the biggest party of our lives without ending up in major debt.  Our families are helping us out a bit, but the majority of the wedding  fund is coming out of our daily budget.  Mr. Crab Cake and I are both working two jobs to make this thing happen.  In addition to our regular jobs, we both teach at the college level part time.

It was super important to us (read…me) that this thing be elegant and classy.  My daddy always said I have caviar taste on a tuna fish budget.

So, to save money (and get my caviar), we enlisted friends, family, the internet, our bosses, random strangers and anyone else who was willing participate in helping us.

The first thing we did was book the museum Mr. Crab Cake works at for our reception.  For us, this was a no-brainer.  Hello free reception site!  I was not originally thrilled with the idea of having my wedding in a military museum, but the free-ness won me over and I’ve since not only come to accept the museum, but am actually excited about it.

I’ve enlisted one of my bridesmaid’s to do the flowers.  Ok, this is not just some friend who has dabbled in floral design.  This girl has a degree in floral design, worked for almost 2 years at a leading florist in Charleston, and has  recently branched out into event planning.  She also did all her own flowers for her wedding last September.  She’s the second person I go to (after Mr. Crab Cake) when making a major wedding decision.  Having her do my flowers has not only allowed me to have beautiful floral arrangements at a reasonable price, but it’s also the only way I will be able to have peonies (!!).  I’m so thankful to her for being willing to come out here early and spend all week designing my flowers.

My step-mother is doing the catering.  Her and her sister love throwing parties.  Honestly, she’s so excited about catering the wedding.  Her and her sister have gone crazy.  They are cooking up a storm, seeing what tastes good and what stores well.  The decision to forgo a professional caterer did bring up some decisions I hadn’t planned on making, like linen rentals and how we were planning on keeping the appetizers warm, as well as what kind of plates we are going to have.  But I still think we’ll end up saving money.

There’s some other stuff in the works, but I’m not quite ready to share it with you!  How are you saving money?